Partners in Practice
Feb 2010
In the spirit of Valentine’s Day, The Health Journal brings you stories of local couples who share more than just a marriage—they both work in the medical field, often in the same office. Read what the following four couples have to say about the joys and challenges of being partners in practice…and in life.
Dr. William & Kathy Magee: Operation Smile
As founders of Norfolk-based Operation Smile, the world-renowned non-profit organization dedicated to treating children with cleft lips, cleft palates and other facial deformities, Bill and Kathy Magee work together tirelessly. Add five children of their own to the equation, and miraculously is more like it.
The couple, married 42 years, started dating in their hometown of Fort Lee, N.J., while in high school. They married eight years later when Bill was still in dentistry school at the University of Maryland.Though the two didn’t work together until founding Operation Smile, they worked hard to take care of their children, starting with the first who was born 15 months after they married.
Their dual career, which they describe as a “passion,” began when the Magees founded Operation Smile in 1982. Today Kathy is the full-time volunteer president and Bill is the chief executive officer.
Taking advantage of unforeseen opportunities and chances has been the cornerstone of the Magee marriage.
For instance, during one pregnancy when Kathy went into early labor, they went to the hospital where Bill’s father was a physician. It was there that an oral surgeon encouraged Bill to pursue medical school.
Bill asked Kathy her opinion about continuing his education and becoming a craniofacial surgeon, along with the loans that went with such an endeavor. She didn’t hesitate and said, “If that’s what you want to do, do it.”
While Bill attended George Washington University Medical School (while seeing dental patients for extra income), Kathy continued her nursing and social work education at night. With children, that required a lot of coordination and sacrifice on each spouse’s part.
“We had three children under [the age of] three, and it was worth it for me to stay home, Kathy says. “At night, Bill took over. I saw the children to bed and then went to school for my master’s degree.”
For instance, while in his last year of medical school, Bill had an opportunity to study in Switzerland with a leading oral surgeon. He’d saved enough money through his dental practice to take a leap of faith and bring his family to Europe.
It was a worthwhile risk that led to a stint in Paris with world-renowned craniofacial physician Dr. Paul Tessier. Though the Magees then had four children under the age of five, they left for Paris, unknowingly planting the roots for Operation Smile.
“One thing led to the next and the next, and our openness about not having money and worrying about the shoestrings and loans paid off,” Bill says. “Both of our personalities are very accepting of challenges.”
Kathy added: “People we met along the way all became part of Operation Smile—in Switzerland, France, New York. We began to gather people, seemingly in the short term, making friends along the way who became long-term friends.”
Another opportunity presented itself when the Magees received an invitation to go to the Philippines on a medical mission.
“The experience shocked all of us,” Bill says. “We treated 40 kids and watched as 250 were sent away. It’s one thing to watch it on TV, but to be in a small room and see what’s really going on, it’s an overwhelming experience.”
That’s when Operation Smile was born. When the couple returned from that trip, they knew that they had to go back to continue the work. They enlisted the help of a few friends, who then enlisted the help of their friends. Since that inspired beginning, Operation Smile has provided free surgeries to more than 140,000 children in 50 countries.
Today Bill maintains a private practice in Norfolk and is co-director of the Institute for Craniofacial and Plastic Surgery at Children’s Hospital of The King’s Daughters. (He is also an associate professor at Eastern Virginia Medical School.)
Through their shared journey the Magees have learned to turn whatever stress they face in working so closely together into something positive and productive.
“We’re two different individuals with two different approaches and skill sets,” Bill says. “Fortunately for us, they complement each other and that has become our advantage.”
Having such passion for their work means that OpSmile talk is rarely off the table, though it doesn’t overwhelm their lives.
Says Bill: “You talk about what’s important to you. We have a lot of other interests. Family is a very big interest, and our family is centered around one another. We take vacations, sometimes with 25 to 30 family members. We play a lot of sports and do a lot of things together. Whatever is dominant at that moment is what we talk about.”
When asked what advice the Magees could offer to other couples embarking on a shared career, Bill says, “You have to be cognizant of what each other’s strengths are and celebrate those strengths and hope that your weakness will be their strength. You have to be respectful in the process and maintain your own independence. You have to know who you are to know who the other person is.”
Kathy offers a pragmatic suggestion for couples who work together: Know when to turn the phone off.
“Some calls can wait until morning,” she says. “You have to respect that. There’s a reason it’s called a ‘crackberry.’ You have to be able to say, ‘Put that crackberry down.’”
Oncologists Elizabeth Harden & Richard Hoefer
"We fell in love in 1988 while serving in the Air Force in San Antonio,” says Elizabeth “Betsy” Harden.
“It was 1989,” Rick gently corrects. They both laugh.
Such is the give and take—and sense of humor—that these oncology professionals have employed to build their marriage of 23 years.
Betsy is an oncologist with Virginia Oncology Associates, (VOA) and Rick is a surgical oncologist at the Dorothy G. Hoefer Comprehensive Breast Center in Newport News (his mother is the founding benefactor).
“Though we’re not in the same practice, we see a lot of the same patients,” Betsy says. “Rick does surgeries and I do medical therapy and chemotherapy.”Rick, a member of Sentara Surgical Specialists, explains that his group has a joint venture with VOA to develop oncology programs throughout the region, which often leads to treating the same patients, particularly breast cancer patients.
“We work closely together to decide on what’s best for the patient, along with mammographers and radiographers,” Betsy says. “It’s a very exciting multidisciplinary program that we have here.”
The couple doesn’t allow the stress of working together and being in such a high-pressure profession to get to them.
“I value her opinion and she values mine, which is always a good thing in a relationship.”
—Dr. Richard Hoefer
“We have a pretty good way of turning things off,” Betsy says. “We’ll talk shop over dinner and things like that. We have a pretty good way of communicating. We have a lot of fun. It’s very rewarding to be on the same wavelength about a lot of things.”
Rick continues: “We each understand what the other’s career is like. I have a pretty good idea what her day is like and what her stresses are like. It’s very helpful when a spouse understands what the other spouse does. I value her opinion and she values mine, which is always a good thing in a relationship.”
While both work many hours and often don’t see each other at home, they also work hard to keep their romance alive.
Says Betsy: “We try to reserve time for us. Friday night is our standing date night, and we make sure to have time with each other.” She adds that carving out time together has become easier since she scaled back on her on-call duty to care for her ailing mother.
Adds Rick: “There always has to be some give and take. We’ve really been blessed in that we love what we do, and that’s a big help. We each respect each other in terms of his or her own career and that’s played a big part as well.”
While healing cancer patients is still the main goal for the couple, they now are willing to take a little more time for themselves.
“We both love to work and hope to keep working a long time,” says Betsy. “But we’re hoping for more vacation time together as the years go on.”
Drs. Michelle & Scott Eichelberger: Chesapeake Pediatrics
Drs. Michelle and Scott Eichelberger, pediatricians at CHKD’s Chesapeake Pediatrics, fell in love while attending James Madison University. At the time, neither imagined that in the future they might marry and work together.
“One of the nice things about working together is that when he was on call and wanted to coach one of the children’s ball games, I’d hold the beeper for him. We could cover each other that way.”
—Dr. Michelle Eichelberger
The two went on to Eastern Virginia Medical School and completed residency training at East Carolina University, marrying and having their first child along the way. When Scott changed his career path from internal medicine to pediatrics, the two began to interview together, hoping to be hired at the same practice. They were thrilled when they were both offered jobs at Chesapeake Pediatrics.
“It was a very young practice and we had the opportunity to get in on the ground level and help to build it up,” Scott says. “And we’ve been here ever since.”The Eichelbergers have four children, ages 12 to 21, and they say that working at the same practice hasn’t hindered them from balancing their personal and professional lives.
“Our practice is good about granting schedule requests, and that really helps us out,” Scott says. Michelle adds: “That helps because we can take care of the kids in shifts. One of the nice things about working together is that when he was on call and wanted to coach one of the children’s ball games, I’d hold the beeper for him. We could cover each other that way.”
Being married and working together has also enhanced their professional life.
As Scott says: “It’s been good to bounce medical issues off each other. If a patient comes in presenting with difficult issues, we’ll talk about it. It’s like having a built-in consult all the time.”
When asked about the difficulty of ceasing talk about patients and their practice, they laugh.
“Our children have a distinct answer to that,” says Michelle. Scott follows: “At the dinner table, they’ll say, ‘OK. No more shop talk.’”
For young couples starting out, the Eichelbergers agree that having a foundation built on faith and trust is the most important thing for two people to share.
“We feel like our Christian faith helped us through difficult times, Scott says. And you’ve got to have trust.” “If you’re on shaky ground to start with and you’re not solid going into [a marriage], you’re put in some jeopardy because [relationships are] hard. Our advantage was that we knew each other for several years before medical school. Sometimes couples who meet in med school or residency have difficulties as their relationship grows. We got to know each other without [the] stress of med school.”
Having a married couple on the team also brings a lot of humor for the staff.
“The nurses love to hear my stories about Scott,” says Michelle, “so they can use them for ammunition [to tease him]. Nothing is secret around here.”
That “everybody-knows-what-everybody-is-doing” element of the medical community is one that they’ve grown comfortable with over the years.
Says Michelle, “When I got pregnant during residency, I had to call Scott and tell him on the phone because I knew that before I got back to the hospital, he’d hear it from someone other than me.”
She continues: “Our lives are an open book, and we’re comfortable with that. Other people in relationships might not be as comfortable with that and prefer to be more private.”
All and all, raising a family and working together has been a boon for the Eichelbergers.
“It’s been a good ride,” says Scott. “I can’t imagine doing this without her. I can’t imagine not doing medicine, period—and I can’t imagine being in practice without her.”
Patricia “Cooka” & Dr. James “Jim” Shaw: Lackey Free Clinic
Jim and Cooka Shaw met in the eighth grade and married while Jim was a fourth-year medical student. When the Shaws’ first child arrived, Cooka, a nurse, became a stay-at-home mother. Though she worked part-time on and off through the years, the thought of working alongside Jim “never crossed the radar screen.”
That changed when Jim, a pulmonologist, was still in full-time practice at Riverside Regional Medical Center. The couple felt a shared calling to serve the Peninsula’s growing number of uninsured people.
In 1995, the Shaws and a friend from Rising Sun Baptist Church in Yorktown started offering free medical treatment one night per week at the church. Two years later, as patient numbers increased along with the number of volunteers to treat them, the clinic moved to the nearby Charles E. Brown Community Center. As word spread about the clinic, it increased its hours to be open two days a week, then three, and it is now open five days a week. In 2003, the Lackey Free Clinic opened on Old Williamsburg Road (in the Lackey area of Yorktown), providing a full range of medical services daily.
Today, with more than 60 volunteer physicians, physician assistants, nurse practitioners, pharmacists and administrative staff, the Shaws have stepped back from day-to-day operations. Jim still sees patients, and Cooka works the front desk one day a week, but they now primarily enjoy watching their faith-based ministry thrive through dedicated volunteers.
“I was focused on medical issues because that’s the way I was trained and the way my brain works. Cooka has always focused on love and compassion.”
—Dr. Jim Shaw
Says Cooka: “When someone has to quit or others move to warmer weather during the winter, the phone will ring with someone who wants to do just that job of the person who left….We give the credit to God.”
Working together has never been stressful for the Shaws, largely because of their calm demeanors and the fact that they kept operations manageable, growing gradually over the years.
Jim says their strengths grew to complement one another, with him providing medical oversight and Cooka providing the warm embrace they wanted their patients to feel.
“I was focused on medical issues because that’s the way I was trained and the way my brain works,” says Jim. “Cooka has always focused on love and compassion. Because these patients are turned away from so many doctors’ offices, it was our vision that we make them feel welcome. They are so often pushed aside because they don’t have health insurance.”
Cooka summarizes their shared vision and work by saying, “We care about the whole person, not just the medical problem.”
Though the clinic has been prominent in the couple’s life, family, friends and outside interests have provided balance—though Cooka adds that maintaining balance takes some effort.
“You have to understand each other’s strengths and weaknesses,” she says. “Through the years, we’ve gained an understanding. He’s the brains and I’m the hands, feet and heart. He keeps me in line, and I keep him in line.”
After 44 years of marriage, the Shaws feel they can offer some solid advice to young couples considering marriage or shared careers: “Pray about it, and try to understand what each other’s position is going to be,” says Cooka. “So many people jump into marriage and don’t discuss the serious aspects. You have to ask, ‘What are your expectations of me? What do you need from me in this endeavor?’”
Having created a successful free clinic that meets the needs of the medically disadvantaged, the Shaws are happy with its success.
“We just put one foot in front of the other and went at it,” Cooka says. “It just took on a life of its own. We believe in God’s plan. We never imagined working as a team, but it’s been wonderful.”